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About Jefferson County Sentinel (Boulder, Mont.) 1885-1899 | View This Issue
Jefferson County Sentinel (Boulder, Mont.), 27 April 1888, located at <http://montananewspapers.org/lccn/sn84036046/1888-04-27/ed-1/seq-1/>, image provided by MONTANA NEWSPAPERS, Montana Historical Society, Helena, Montana.
••••••••••••••• •••••••• . , -,••••••.A.•_•••••• • •,. i.s'neJo h ksoialpiegy agissonsgatuitgassaccsago-caalasigagameigr • 9 JEFFERSON COUNTY SENTINEL. The /Pioneer Newseptaper of aefreraion Count y—it, Ustinily aournal..--Independent In Politieis. VOL. 3. .,'N (,.) 36. 1 .1 )EB, NIONT 83 PER YEAR - .9 • The Most Desirable 4iothlng House in Helena is The Northwestern. Right in the heart of the city, opposite the Grand Central Hotel, we ire located, with a complete stock of WINTER CLOTHING, MEN'S FURNISHING- GOODS, BOOTS 'AND SHOES. , Hats, Caps, Gloves, Blankets and Quilts. In short, anything from head to foot for Men, Youths, Boys and Children. We sell for cash at the lowest living prices. When you come to Helena be sure and call on us. In the mean time send us your order order by mail or express, which shall receive prompt attention. T. E. LANDSMAN & CO. • THOS. F. MURRAY, DEALER IN p Co an o k ci la a e m at p ing n L U11 ii,Ai. IF2-01\T, Nails : , Giant 1 'OWDER, CAPS and I Ise, C12_1OCICIR/Y, Lamps, Chandeliers, Sash, Doors and Moldings, Plated Ware, Glassware and Bar Goods. agents for the Celebrated Buckeye Force Pumps and Shutler Wagons, 0 :0— }- TIN SHOP inceTnwtr work and Re- pairin g naed: :: Boulder- • • ▪ - Montana, Just Re -Op oiled R1111 Ile-Flicit Boulder HOT Springs. Wonderful Curative Properties ! —IN ALL CASES OF -- Chronic, Muscular and Inflammatory Rheumatism. Lead. Poisoning, Constitutional Weakness, and. General Debility. A PLEASANT . RESORT! FIRST-CLASS HOTEL AND BATHING ACCOMMODATIONS. Reached by Stage from Helena, Butte, Wickes, Elkherr, Comet, and all Points in the Territory. Terms moderate. k first-class Physician DR. IRA A LEIGHTON,. Is constantly in attendance For full information address, WM. TROTTER, Prop., Boulder, Mont. U. M. PAscass, Helena. War. MORRIS, Boulder ='a=clien. IVZorris, 0 LESALE AND RETAIL — 'arrv a large stock of . • 1.0tU014, cipmICALS, PAINTS, OILS, BRUSIIBS, WALL RAPER - 'WINDOW ' GLASS, PATENT MEDICINES, PERIetYMERY,' And TOILET ARTICLES. Also . Lamps, Candies, Tobaccos, Cigars, BLANK LICKJI(S and wrArrioNErev: A FINE ASSORTMENT OP WALL -PAPER IN STOCK. PRESCRIPTIONS FILLED AT ALL HOURS. A fine line of Watches n.rd Tewelry always or. hand.. The Windsor House. H. M. K EENE, Prop BOULDER, Mont Everything First -Class BOARD PER WEEK. ... DAY, • • 7 00 2.00 LEES TAYIA)IL Carpenter&Bunder All kinds of Doors, Window Frames, Sash, Counters, Etc. made.to Order. Plans, Specifications and Estimates prepared. BOULDER, Mont. CHARLES ENGLIN11, PRACTICAL Boot and ChOomakor, BOULDER, MO N Mr. Englund has permanently located among us, and those wiahing anything in his line will do well to call. tvr Repairing Neatly Done.jiti Boots and Shoes made to order. Satisfac- tion guaranteed. ' THERE WILL BE A BALL ON 'THE 18th Day of May, eivIte Be ME Boold8r Lulu No. 19, K. of P., At Boulder Hot Springs, which promises to be the event of the season. MUSIC BY Itossner's Orchestra of Helena. Tickets, including Supper, $3.00 By ORDER CouIIrrEE BOULDER NEWS DEPOT R. J. Dougherty, Agent. Fine bile of CIERIT, Tobaccos and Smokers' Articles kept oonstaittli on hand. Fresh Fruit., Candies, Nuts, •ft.c. NXIVAI P A PER)4, MAGAZINES AND PERTODICALS Always on itale;tir subscriptions taken for same kUld mailed to any address. quiet Reading Room in Connection. - - - BOULDER BAKERY. HEADY NEXT WEEK. Will bake • Fresh Bread, Pies, Cakes, Etc., EVERY DAY. -CONFECTIONERY A SPECIALTY. -- Goods Delivered Free of Charge. Op [mite Bach, Cory & Co.'s. r_.=.j AUGUST FO(. -EL, Prop. Reuben Warren, Livery inql Fd STABLE Carriages, Buggies, Saddle Horses, Double Teams and Everything in The IAvery BOrLDER CITY, MONTANA, - BILL NYE AND HOFMANN. • Any , One lOCI1L4 1 In tote It its ••••t. I spent the evening at tee Josef Hofmann last ISaturti.: • the little wizard of the pi&t. week be riding on the bo H toward his home. I a .!.!. ,! great many questions n • other things, and so Ti. , which would aseist - or.y. I wanted to a-, curred to him that prodigy, also what and whether Ha.. only a nom de plume. It N, I could take him on ea told him about Jack a , could ever and at. afterward print s• I called at th.• : bert and his gime.: ,,e I A ••,,, math street, and for half an hour talked to them abo..: myself in a very an wat . while we waited ft.:: ;1 his own room, which we - t eat . aaat one on the first door hp .g To t -avesith street, and not only large, 1D.1:, tastily furnished and cheery. For pare half hour I talked about my struggiler ... child wonder and told my bleeds hotilif Lad suc- ceeded at last, at a time of Nfe when it brought me very little joy. Dr. Lambert said it certainly must be dis- heartening to find myself at. last within reach of my goal and about to win a place for myself . as an infant prodigy, but, alas, at a period of my life when I no or looked well in a Garabaldi waist d knicker- bockers. Master Hofmann in the Was up stairs developing a negative in &irk room. He was given a camera, etc., b •. Falk the other day, and now he can very good picrare and tell you how he It. While we were talking about it he mahed in with the negative under his arm. hi sore 4 kind of belted blazer of soft dark reot and Mack stripe and knickerbockers anal !darli hose. His LTITO down collar w as f a genne e . w ith a white seed with pale pink dote? it, and he had the;air of a very busy ass weighiug a' out forty-seven pounds. Beheld out his hand to • dl took it In mfnea.L woold a little, ten tom- tit. I addressed bun in easy, reedulated tenets, telling hiin that I had alpone him iu the papers awl, that I had to play with him and stay all itight. then drew away from me and went in ther room, but returned in lees than at; eta and talked freely with the family . ;.. .4}eama n way about matterseyforeign to me. He speaks !airman fiu- only, and I enjoyed in- a, ,•ry much. He ha* been sone •• • h adulation, and I gathered . e anise that be was very sauce n not understand French French idioms, but he di i • any of those while I wa.- speak with a strong, fe, but when I try to con. - Child IA • .1 , iet ks to It. :out of int-wing :I.,: :rte . would this 1, i 1 low borne ie ask him a • te tuusic and -1 .1. own a few -er--;. my mem- .T tHst &S 11 , re.. . ane or --a that et. ao: while e 'Bete -talk I very *eel and ;as aboat him. of Dr. Lam - I : • I I . mg. I do ' new some iem to use lerman I ,ry accent, eple who have never had the 44.1'. ea Ameri- can seminary I do not suistioeci in riveting their attention. I remained some time talk, tag with j)r. Lambert and than ; Master Hof- m an n said g00.4.Ly to me and t upetairr to bed, from which I gathered the inter- view had tasusinistsat„ I do not claim to miderstand the German language when uttered in the rapid and reck- less, asthmatic tone assumed by Germans, who rely upon It solely, but I judged by the way Josef took off llis boots upstairs and said his prayers that change of mime anti rest would du lain good. He is certainly a very bright boy, ex- tremely nervous, precocious and very natu- rally spoiled by the gross flattery he has re- ceived while here. As a matter of fact, his parents have almost last control of him since h e /h a s been so worshiped as he has here. And what can a parent do with a 10 -year -old boy who can fill the Academy of Musiseniad turn people away every night for weeks with his wonderful music! Can you reprimand the musical hero of the meson, or shut up the leader of an orchestra fa a dark closet/ Can you deprive a pianist of his pie when be may retaliate by refusing to Play! Can yeti ePalik 4 party with a technique or tan the jacket of a virtuoso! Can you compel a composer to remain in after school, or box the ears of a maestro? Nay, nay. Behind his divine fortiisimo and musical motif he is safe, When he said to himself, ej will become a child wonder,\ he began to outgrow the rules which gevern actions of other children and, saving up 1.. pennies until he had enabled himself to pur- chase a concert grand piano, it was n , until he had a technique which sound. rate. Josef Hofmann has shown us that steady industry and devotion to one object will Ai last succeed. This should teach us a valuable lesson. It shows us that one may become a child wonder early in life if he wilLaet him- self about it 4ad stick to it. Do not be dis- couraged about becoming 4 chilci wonder on account of your youth. Persevere and you may win at last Still, greatnees brings its resulting penal- ties. Little Josef Hofmann, at a time when other boys are just waking up to the sad truth that \the cow is in the lot,\ \the pig is In the sty,\ \the sun is up and we are up, too,\ etc., is receiving a mail like a member of congress each day, and in it people ask him about his methods, and they ship large, fat, plush autograph albums to him and ask him to write in them, and they send alligator covered albums and low brewed leather al- bums and meek little floral albums with in- flamed bouquets on each leaf and fancy de- signs made by local penmen in violet ink and bluing; also, &lbw= in which ei e eey w a x Alfrida \if she remembers the day they went over to Uncle Stikeleather's.\ Pimple write to ask him to come to their twiner to itrquse -them, for they are tired cd other things and pine fur a phenomenon. do not blame Josef for going home where freedom is not run into the ground. Had he remained here another year he would have gone home with softening of the brain or St. Vitine pale) .4. .• • ' gr.• • man lace ,A all ; ; do to stand in the full gla. f the gr. .lie eye and, with a glass .. .• r, - one hand and a cracker kindly word to each and a.. offense, or telling the same , canton, or Imp _ •••:. e I - • Bo what '-an a e do with a al.,- ,e--•• peol•e Inejere:tit fee. 1.. g o 7. , ' and :th hint : layl a with a :.• sy ,. • .. and a body like a 1- :au adula- tion of a great cell' _ It is quite cola-: : 4 e, -a -tier • eng Ham/int:a early it -s rei ! of trouble hut aeent, but s .1 is ,t No :it i.•-y s the • z, - - : r the death or mental N-, manages could ciffee rat.t• make them run the risk of breaking leo, down. He turns his back upon a fele elle and goes to Faderhuxi, thereby the ephemeral jay of laine el.,!.•1 n sit a•r for the hope pf becQmnit. rt 9 9 : 71.4 Ttao, 4.1.1.1 it greet Jt.aL .ii ii.. ii..ev!'n MOTO than y; ta fetal it - .ay yUr v.vagr. be 3 1k Lea are ...trown tip and liava icirlicil tO si..ILL tor keel of German I hope teeneet yeti S-41 aeaei. -13111 Nye in New Yori: 1-3 watm TrIlekiN In the. Snow. \7 • f old eharactei an.-- ; T . .:if 13. 1; hunters. Old Dunete. Met ;. , • Viola. He likes to get ,• city gr.- ,ete tee woods and paralyze him we ; ..iah:tig knowledge of wood craft at. -kill in tracking game. Dunk is one of t • - lent, mysterious fele , te that yell read al. a • plays that on te• ! • here - One a -a with a alsai • • „- thr leunk e. the h jno eesei of Lee c h ap ,„ . , . • : reek in the snot, 'it, mote ; other f• Ele See , . • low to trait piek, sto 1:113. . it hat I. , • the St. Ty a.. raj' .1u.td • laugh t la Dunk.\ -San Fran- eisce kesaminer. The i4ire..t Thing In Fads. / T. - 7 , -T, - ; 1 • ! r4 _ MRS. (1. PaNFLaTIMEL LIGHT9TILIC/HT. Friday evenings in April. Sparring at 10:30. A Sail Farewell. \Laura is your heart freer The young man who spoke these words sat on the extreme periphery of a cushioned chair in the elegant apartment and leaned forward In uncontrollable agitation. The handker- chief with which in his excess of emotion be wiped his nose ever and anon trembled visi- bly, and his voice had that dreamy, touching Intonation that marks a sensitive, high souled man in the last stage of influenza and 411 - requited affection. \Why Mr. Hankinson,\ replied the lovely girl, with downcast eyes, but with a kind of don't come any nearer expression on her face, \yoa.r question take* me by surprise, and I hardly\— \letterer burst forth the young man im- petuously, as he glanced in a laboriously careless way at a small ivory tablet concealed in his left hand, \it is hardly possible for you to Mal* the difficulties that beset -that are peculiar to the crisis which at this hour I face. You would be disposed to laugh, per- haps, if I should tell you what a trifle clogs the free cry of a heart filled with devo-with excess of love, yet which affee-which love will be heard, despite the barriers that ad- verse fate appears to have erected just at this peried. Hear elm feeble yet eager cry of a heart, Laura, that\— \Mr. Hankinson,\ interrupted the young 3•4, wit • ,..„Vgilled air, \Yoh stiosk musk singularly. What is the matter with your The youth wiped his nose again with nerv- ous haste, threw the ivory tablet frantically across the room, atid once more began: \The hatter with be, Bias Laura, is a cold Id by head -a beatily, horrid iciftuedZa. 14 by igdoradce add idexperiedce I had fadeled I could tell you of by affeetiode that I could bake bevel!' udderstood without tudgg ady words that would codvey to you ady idea of the real idfirbity udder which I ab suffirigg. I shall dever agaid,\ continued the youth, bitterly, \try to bake a codfesslod of love by boycottigg the letters eb add ed. You sbile, Hiss Laura! You laugh! You bock at by bi n a r y! Good evedigg, Hiss Kajodesr Waving his handkerchief wildly the un- fortunate young man blew a nasal blast that shook the house, grabbed his hat, rushed out into the chill night air, and was followed all the way home by frau. Chicago detectives, who mistook him for the lamented Mr. Tas- cott.-Chloage Tribune, lea Opulence Explained. ff , Mrs. Houlihan-Arrah, Mira , Lee ,a,. this be youreilf, all blazhin' wid diamonds? Houlihan-Throth it is, thither. 01 was dhriviu' a hack the day when the blizzard sthruck New York -Life. Hard on the Teacher. A pretty good joke was recently played on • teacher in one of our public schools who rather prides himself on his knowledke of geology. When the class in petrifaction* was called one of Its members, a boy, handed the professor a piece of rock candy end gravely asked him what It was, \It's a piece of crystallized quartz,\ said the pro- fessor with a hasty glance at it. \But said the boy, astonished at the success of 144 trick, and wishing to carry it further, et 084 scratch it,\ and he dug but apiciee with a pin. \Oh! then it is a -.4 alum,\ said the salary kicker, and tie— -- kept on study- ing. -Buffalo Courier. collecting )l, .!A,nd (to yrife)-r-i've ;on out half the dee tang t , ) a.- and I'm riled en... e to , n It bet ; - altl end .11't 1 , e: • asoe. earae- earat ant ening the door) -The butcher, sorr, is doe , . lairs with his bill. Husband -Tell him to call again-Life. A Good Excuse. Teach. r-rnA afraid, gime fitierer, that you vie end dilliculey inposiliag • ' s't tn you are absent frit:. - .1 e, • a.. i there any good reason 1. Crirl-Oh, yes, indeed. I my ..;reduation dress fttted.- . 4 . .......- News. Dry lite 14,(1 -What Lir , \A love ht: ay -- I- , it n1ter.-st:;14.7 ' • s. .‘; , , story. -fl:et at The old Adage I otnea True. '•\1 - iso evil that men .14 lives after them.\ A •••a. taut v) play is now exhibit• ed in New York. --Lowed Citazea, STORIES ABOUT MEN. How \Bishop\ Oberly Surrendered at Last to Dr. Mary Walker. John EL Oberly is the latest victim to a etress of tar. Mary Walker. Lately ! Wition aen to secure an appointee, • - - • .. , usion BerfiCt. her to oh- , 'it lien. : k. These fail- , t. . to aped:, a examination _evil service board and then confront Talon conimisaioners with a certificate • lv authenticated. Having come to aGon she announced to some . - proposed to call on Mr. Oberly i talk with him. He heard Dr. Mary Walker was to call upon him and deter- mined to dodge an interview. Long ago he ••• 'F s 4:teci a small den in the subterranean • eta of city hall where the civil service coin - ;seen has its offices, to avoid some of the ells that are made upon him. lit Ili - Mary three days to track him to L. she finally did so, One day T''f was in his hiding place when a . - on his door. He opened it and there stood Dr. Mary Walker. \Is Mr. Oberly here?\ she inquired. \No said Mr. Oberly, while his face con- tinued to bear those marks of Christian inno- cenoe which have gained for him the cogno- men of \Bishop.\ \No Mr. Cherie , is not in, but Pm his messenger and will tell him any message you may wish to leave.\ \I'll call again,\ replied the doctor. Ten days afterward the scene was repeated. Dr. Mary called and was again told by the obliging \messenger\ that Mr. Oberly was not in, but that any word left would be told to him. The next day Mr. Oberly was again disturbed by a gentle rap. He went smiling to the door, but was more than disgusted to find Dr. Mary Walker there. \Good morning, Mr. Oberly,\ she said as she pushed her way into the room. \But I'm not Mr. Oberly,\ declared the good \bishop while the blushes that in- sisted in reddening his face on account of the prevarication even in eelf-defense gave the lie to his denial. \Oh but I know you are Mr. Oberly,\ re- joined the imperturbable man -woman. \I thought you were fooling me, and I called on Mrs. Oberly before coining this morning and got her to show me your picture. I'm sure of you this time.\ The \bishop\ was floored by the (Victor. Be surratidered then and there and gave het all this information she wanted about civil service examinations. - Washington Letter iu Chicago Tribune. A Compromise. The Rev. Clinton Locke is a humorist. Not long ago a worthy couple came to him, bear- ing between them a babe of exceeding tender age. \We want you to baptize her,\ said the father. \What name have you decided upon?\ asked the reverend gentleman. \Alas sir,\ answered the father, dismally, \we have not decided. Had the child been a boy we should have named him Benjamin. A favorite name of mine, sir, is Benjamin.\ \Yes and of mine, too,\ echoed the mother. \But it is a girl,\ said the father, wofully. \And we don't know what to call her,\ added the mother. • \Cheer up, my good air,\ cried the -saga- cious pastor, 'land you, too, my good woman: be not cast down in spirit. We may yet find some way of applying to this child the name you so much prefer.\ \Sakes alive!\ cried the father, \we can't name her Benjamin!\ \Nay nay -very true,\ answered the holy man, softly, \but we can name her Ben thir!\-Chicago News. Tim Campbell's Elevator Experience. The Hon. \Tim\ Campbell, of New York, told some of his fellow members the other day how one of his constituents came to see him and related to him his experience in one of the Capitol elevators. To use the man's 04TO , words: \Is Mr. Campbell in, sorr' says I. Says the man with the soger cap: 'Will yes step inr So I \tips intil the closet, and all of a sud- dint he pulls at a rope, and it's the trooth I's tellin' yes., the walls of the building begin runnin' down to the cellar. \Howly =lather,\ says I, \phat'll become of Bridget and the childer which was left be- low there!\ Says the isoger cap man: \Be aisy, sorr; be all right when yez come down.\ \Come down, is it?\ says I, \and is it no closet at all, but a haythenish balloon that yes got tne in?\ And with that the wall stopped stock still, and he opened the door, and there I was with the roof jist over my head! And that's phat saved me from gain' up till the hivins entirely\. -New York Tribune, Nat Goodwin as a Manager. Comedian Nat Goodwin relishes a joke on himself as well as if it were on somebody else. His first managerial effort was in the nature of a joke on himself. As he relates it., he organized a company in Boston to play in Augusta, Me., for one night. He had no doubt of the ability of his company, the fascinating qualities of his play, and the 'superiority of his managerial talent. He went to Augusta. He also returned to Boston. He appeai t e0 low spirited. \Hello Nat!\ exclaimed a friend at the Parker house. elow did your Augusta iiku4imota like Your pla:yr , ' 41 Weil-enn-er,\ was the hesitating reply. 4 1 think it would have liked it, perhaps, if had waited for the *mud act.\ -Detroit raw Prete. His Own Diagnosis. Mother—And do you really feel so very bad, Bobby? Bobby -Yes, ma. I ain't quite sick enough to need any medicine, but I'm a little bit too pick to go to school. -.New York Sun. A Diversity of Opinion. e.• .4 'Mee Hobeen (to It'•hki7e, - who is out calling with his mote:age-Tete is the first time you have seen my baby, isier it, Bobby? Bobby (critically)- Yes, ma'am, and I think it's quite ilia.. Mrs. Hobson-Nicii, Bobby! Why, it is love) v ! Bei:het-era says it's the homeliest child she ever saw. -The Epoch. Consolation. A lady dressed in deep mourning and hav- ing a look of Bostonian refinement and re- serve, got on a Chicago train bound fot Den - one day last week. Away out in ir*TIM 4 -N Clear Deadwood creek, there boarded the train a native of the soil in the shape of a woman in a green delaine dress, a blue and red shawl and a yellow nubia. She dropped easily and gracefully into the seat in front of the lady in black, turned round, stared hard for a moment and then said: - \Widderr \I -I --did you speak to me?\ asked the lady in surprise. \Yes'm-widder ''Yes.\ \Thought so. Quite recent, eh!\ \Yes.\ \What ailed him!\ \Consumption.\ \Linger a good whiter \I -I -yes.\ \Much ag'net?\ \Yes indeed.\ \Coughed a sight, heyr \Oh yes; but I\— \I know what'd cure him in less'n a month. Never knovred it to fail, an' I've seed it tried in eases where they'd been give up -by five • I , ai • Ts. Yerm. But it ain't no use talkin' that now. Any childrenr \Yes three.\ \His folks got 'em?\ \No; but really, I\— \Two boys an' a girl, or two girls an' a boy!\ \Two girls.\ \Oh! D'd you get your thirds out an' out -!\\Really, madam, r_ \Or did he leave a will? , \Excuse me, but\— \The law gives a woman her thirds, but 'taint often she gits 'ern out 're out. I think she'd art to have half, don't your \I -I -really, I don't know.\ \-Well I do. Was you made gardeen of the children?\ \No -that is\— \Well I bet I'd be gardeen of my own young tins if my man was to die. These gar - deans git the propty half the time. Did he have money in bank!\ \I beg your pardon; but\— \You ort to made him put it in your name. It makes it tots easier when the man dies to settle r, tlethings up. His kin try to break the w \Excuse me\— \A man cayn't die nowadays lhotxt a pack o' his folks ti -yin' to break the will, no matter how many wives and children he has. You goin' to wear crape all the time or only a year?\ \Pardon me, but\— \It's beconain' to you, but kinder expensive for common wear. But dear me, you ain't inore'n 36 or 37, are your No \Id re on il ' I t y. know how you feel 'bout second marriages, but I\— \Oh madam, please\.__ \You'll marry agin, now Pil bet you do. Oh, I know how you feel now. My sister Cindy felt and talked jist so, an' she married agin in six months, an' done well, too. I'd wait a year, if I was you. It looks better, shows respect and all that; but if I was young as you an' had only three children But the lady in black had fled to the next oar, and her consoler turned to the man on her right and said: \Talk 'bout her not marryin' agin! I've an ides she's gout' west a -purpose to see if she kin do well there, and I don't blame her.\ -Detroit Free Lerma The Enterprising Housewife. He -How they do advertise that Recamier Cream, I see it everywhere. She -So do I, and it must be good. Ihave written the milkman to send it instead of Alderney. -Life. In Eterna.limmmerville. Hotel Waiter (in southern California)-Or- angesravralicedquartereistewedfriedbaked? Guest (desperately) -I don't want 'ern in any shape. I want meat and potatoes. \Meat?\ \Yes meat.\ \Potatoes!\ \Yee potatoes.\ Waiter (to proprietor a few moments later) -Send for the police; crazy man in the dining room. -Omaha World. Water Thicker Than Blood Tests Time. Stranger at Table (to Um. Washington Boomer) -I understaad . the Potomac river water is very bad, Mrs. a-4 hadn't hoticed it. Strangen-Why, I heard it was erceedingly thick and muddy. Mrs. B. (to servant) -Mary, bring in a pitcher of water, Mary (from the kitchen) -Yes, m'am. Where's the shoe -ell -Washington Critic. Revenge Is Sweet. \Mother said Miss Clara, \do you think Bobby ought to lounge in that handsome chair!\ \Certainly not, Bobby,\ said the mother, reprovingly, \you might break it.\ \If it's strong enough to hold Clara and Mr. Featherly,\ argued Bobby, as he slowly slid down, \it ought to be strong enough to bold a little boy.\ -New York Sun. An Unfortunate Man. Applicant at Hospital -Can you allow me to remain here a few days? I'm so far gone P11 die if I don't have proper care.\ \How long do you expect to remain!\ \Until next Thursday.\ \What are you going to do then?\ \Then I'm going to fight Snugger, the champion of England, for the diamond belt,' -Nebraska State Journal. AU Be Wanted. A circus proprietor, having had his outfit carried away from him in a freshet, re- marked that he would not mind the ducking 90 much if he could only get his canvas back. -Yonkers Gazette. A Good Chance for a Homeless Giant. A lady advertises that she has \a fine, airy, well furnished bedroom for a gen- tleman twelve feet square.\ - Collegiate Journal. Likely. A roll of butter was recently found in a well tee. Long Island. /Probably the landlady who owned it forgot to lock it up the night 1-A , fore it Tan away. -New York Morning J ouriaai, 6
